It is the things in commonthat make relationships enjoyable,but it is the little differences that make them interesting.
- Todd Ruthman

Age does not protect you from love. But love, to some extent, protects you from age.
- Jeanne Moreau, French Actress

It doesn't matter if the guy is perfect or the girl is perfect, as long as they are perfect for each other.
- "Good Will Hunting"

Sometimes the one you love turns out to be the one who hurts you the most, and sometimes the friend who takes you into his arms and cries when you cry turns out to be the love you never knew you wanted.
- "Ally McBeal"

Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.
- Robert Heinlein

When you like someone, you like them in spite of their faults. When you love someone, you love them with their faults.
- Elizabeth Cameron

Put love first. Entertain thoughts that give life. And when a thought or resentment, or hurt, or fear comes your way, have another thought that is more powerful -- a thought that is love.
- Mary Manin Morrissey

Opposites attract, but after marriage, opposites attack. Most of the time, we are attracted to people who don't have the things that we have. Incompatibility is why we get married, but it's also used as a reason to divorce.Incompatibility is just a lack of communication. If we just try to love [our spouse] the way we want to be loved, we are in trouble. Unless you communicate, it's difficult to know how to love another person.
-Dr. Charles Lowery

One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: that word is love.
-Sophocles

It's only in the mysterious equations of love that any logical reasons can be found. I am only here tonight because of you. You are all I am. You are all my reasons.
-"A Beautiful Mind"

Have a heart that never hardens, and a temper that never tires, and a touch that never hurts.
-Charles Dickens

You know, that moment when you kiss someone and everything around you becomes hazy. And the only thing in focus is you and that person. And you realize that that person is the only person that you're supposed to kiss for the rest of your life. And for one moment you get this gift. And you want to laugh and you want to cry because you feel so lucky that you found it and so scared that it will go away all at the same time.
-"Never Been Kissed"

Love consists in this, that two solitudes protect, and touch, and greet each other.
-Rainer Maria Rilke

Love withers with predictability; its very essence is surprise and amazement. To make love a prisoner of the mundane is to take its passion and lose it forever.
-Leo Buscaglia

We can only learn to love by loving.
-Iris Murdoch

To the world you might be one person, but to one person you might be the world.
-Unknown

Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it. Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it. Hatred darkens life; love illumines it.
-Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

The supreme happiness in life is the conviction that we are loved.
-Victor Hugo

it's the start of the winter season.. the weather's frequently changing..
and i'm starting to get sick.. along side with the pile of homeworks and projects i have since it's almost the end of the fall semester..

will i make it? *sigh*

funny how all of these worries suddenly fly away with just a simply line from you..
i just want to vanish.. in an untouched island with you..

can the world just be free of worries? of war? where everyone can live free of fear.. a world ignorant of violence.. a world filled only with laughter and love..

*sigh* utopia..

i'm back to this same old feeling again.

missing you.

there are days that our love is enough to fill the gap. but most of the time, i need you.
will you still be there when i get home? will our fate be just like your friend's? hopeful at first but towards the end they had to part ways?

i don't want us to. i want us to fight these challenges together, though we're not physically beside each other. like i always tell myself, i have faith in you and i have faith in our love. let us not let temptations, the distance and other trials end this thing we share. i've felt our love and i know how great it is. please don't let go. i know we're still far from the end line but please don't let go.

don't let go.

i was watching Grey's Anatomy last night..
and towards the end.. this is what Merideth said..
at least this is what i heard.. =P

"not all wounds are superficial.
most wounds run deeper than we can imagine.
we cant see them with a naked eye.
and then there are the wounds that take us by surprise.
the trick with any kind of wound or disease is to dig down and find any source of wound or injury.
and once you've found it try like hell to heal that suffer."
-Grey's Anatomy-

--originally posted last Nov 4, '06 12:38 AM--

*sigh*

i'm bored. but i got so many things to do. i got a really really long list of assignments, projects, readings, speeches, tours, etc. it's just that i'm not eager to do them. i lost my determination. and so i cling to my new bestfriends "boredom" and "internet".

i've been spending too much time in front of the computer these past few months. which is really unusual because i am not the computer type of person. but now, i think i've become addicted to the internet and to the wonders a computer does. just like right now. instead of going to bed and rest so i can have energy for tomorrow's struggles, i'm here. i'm here encoding this crap.

in fact i wasn't thinking of writing about my new pals. a while ago i was thinking of something else to write but as i press the letters in my keyboard thoughts came to my mind. and here i am again. reflecting about my life. about its' new obstacles and whatsoever. i guess i've been trying to avoid reality these past few months. i've been trying to escape my new life with excuses that i'm challenged by the internet and by my computer. that i need to master them to be able to get back on track. what an escape goat. i'm really good with it though. but i'm tired of it. in a day i can't anymore count the number of hours i dedicate to my computer and i've lost track to the number of times i sign in to friendster, multiply, myspace, tagged, my blog, my high school class' blog, my friends' blogs, tristancafe, youtube, and my 3 email accounts and to whatever sites that come to my mind. good thing i still have my brain during classes. it hasn't failed me but i've failed it, a lot of times already.

i'm getting sick and tired of this routine. (or of my life?) oh well, not that it's really boring. but no matter what i do i just can't forever hide from reality. it's already december next month. i need to hustle to get back to my spot. my list says i need to rush! and despite how lazy i think i've become i can still feel that atenean spirit in me that says "ADMG". i don't wanna disappoint my God. if i can't do this for myself or my family, at least i might try for Him.

gosh.. what am i saying? it's already early morning. i need to have some sleep.

--originally posted last Oct 26, '06 11:20 PM--

1. parachute jump (superman!)
2. jet ski (oh yeah!)
3. scuba dive (i see Ariel the mermaid)
4. swim and sit under a waterfalls
5. tour over some of the places in Europe
6. shout at the top of a building (im the queen of the world!)
7. bungee jump (woohoo!)
8. go car racing (exciting!)
9. ride on the largest ferris wheel which is the London Eye ("If Only" ba? hehe)
10. drive across the world's largest bridge which is Akashi-Kaikyo in Japan (oh man! i don't like Japan. but i looooove Japanese dishes!)
11. memorize all the 35,000 words in my Webster's New World Pocket Dictionary (gosh! that's harder than commiting suicide.. hehe.)
12. be part of a shooting club (oohhh.. guns might come in handy..?? hehe..)
13. enrol in a dance school and learn all kinds of dances except ballet (i'm not the barbie type of girl. i hate too girlish things. but i've always been into dancing. just wanna continue what i've started.)
14. star in an action movie. Tomb Raider would be really cool. (hey! shut up! it's free to dream anyway! not that i really want it.)
15. have a concert in Araneta Coliseum (oh yeah! sold out tickets! and standing ovation! bwahahaha!)
16. befriends with John Prats (nah!!! don't need this anymore. i've already seen him a couple of times. plus, i already found the "John" of my life. hehe)
17. learn to play the drums! (i already know how to play the piano and the guitar. im ready to enter the world of drums. one man band ba?!?!? who cares!)
18. be a princess! (even in my own world only)

it's a really really long list!!!!!!!! more to come...

--originally posted last Oct 20, '06 9:29 PM--

i experienced the first step of physical pain today. but i am happy. i guess because i had long wanted for this to happen. and finally it's here after more than 5 years of waiting.

i admit. it's hard. it's very tough. i don't even know until when i could continue fighting. but this is just the first step. everyone went through this stage. well, i guess those blessed with the skills didn't have to undergo the difficulty i'm feeling. but still. this is just the beginning. if i give up now i'm just proving the others that i am weak. i know i can acquire that strength if i just have patience and determination. the world is willing to teach me. i just have to be willing to accept those lessons and teach myself too.

everything in this world is tough. i know i may feel pain and a lot of difficulty. but the world will not change the way it is just for me. i have to mold myself to cope with it. i have to be strong if i want to survive. if i also want to be one of the best someday. i know i can learn fast. and i believe i can do this. i may fall. i may stumble. i may do silly things. i may make a fool out of myself. and people will continue to laugh at me. but that's all part of it. the price of all these pain is great. like they say, "no pain, no gain."

i know i am a fighter. i may loose faith in myself at times. but i have confidence that i can do this. i love what i'm doing. i am enjoying the challenge. i always keep my word. God never lets me down and i won't fail him. i can do this. i will survive. i will always pray to one day be part of the best. and get that respect.

and that black thing around their waist with words written in color red. they are who we call "masters"

--originally posted last Oct 14, '06 12:07 AM--

every girl has her own fairytale.

i used to not have one. till i was influenced by the people around me. i realized how great it would be to dream. to finally experience, even for just one night, how it would be like to be a princess. even just the sense of how it feels. even for just one night.

a night for yourself. a night where all that matters is you. a night where all the stars shine upon you. and you just can't stop yourself from smiling and be thankful for all those love. all these years.

just one night to feel your the most beautiful princess in the whole wide world. (sounds very childish) just one night to spend with all the people you love. to hear how you came into their lives, how you once made them laugh and cry, how you where there when they needed you and how they witnessed the sad and happy times in your life. just one night to remind you that you live a great imperfect life. and how all these people made it feel almost close to perfection.

just one night to laugh with all your friends. just one dance to remember, with the one whom you gave your heart to. just one night to count your countless blessings. just one night to be really thankful. to be really grateful.

yet. just one decision. and all those fantasies disappear all of a sudden. the fairytale you once dreamt of is now just a memory of all those years that you were once full of hope.

i closed that book. i forced myself to leave that chapter unended. i try to forget how i once hoped to be a princess. yet they keep on asking how i wanted the story to end. all those questions brought life to my fantasies. they made me dream again. to hope again.

all only to just break me. to fall on my knees once more. i don't want to open that book anymore. i'm tired of feeling this emptiness. this isn't about feeling a princess because of the material things I have. this isn't about the masked smiles. this isn't about the unfamiliar laughters. this isn't about the chained limited freedom. this is about my life. i wanted that one night for all the people who shaped me to be present.

i asked for just one night. but without them. celebrating is just feeling alone. the stars are just darkness that blinds me. it is just one way of breaking me more apart. i will not be whole. again. that one night will not anymore complete me. because without those people. i can never be. till then i can only be a puzzle with a missing piece.

--originally posted last Oct 12, '06 5:45 PM--

a thought i had in the past.
it's funny how after a person had hurt you several times, you still want to be with him/her.

the miracle of friendship.
it's pretty ironic with how you'll find the perfect friend in someone who once caused you terrible pain. when he/she was the reason you cried a lot in the past. but now? he/she is one of the best people who came into your life. someone whom you call a true friend.

--originally posted last Oct 10, '06 2:02 PM--

I know I did something wrong.
And it hurts me every time I do it over and over again.
It hurts me.
Yet I try to be who I am not.
I try to be numb.
I try to pretend I don't get hurt by the pain.
But every time I do; the more I feared, the more I get scared.
I'm just trying to protect and to keep something I really love and care for.
And this is the only way I know how to do it.
It's sad to admit the reality but I am not blind with its' presence.
Yet I try to avoid it and just think of other causes to why this thing exists.
Sometimes I think I'm the only one doing my part, well am I?
It would have been better if the other road is open.
If only turnabouts are that easy and don't require skills.
I don't regret this happening and I try not to think of its' consequence, though I know it will come soon.
Because I'd rather suffer alone than loose that one thing I care for.

--originally posted last Sep 21, '06 11:40 PM--

misogyny?
feminism?
male deviance?
supremacist capitalist patriarchy?
white male dominance?
staying in power?
black youth culture?
gangsta rap?
music that hate women?
ice cube?
change is inevitable?
white?
black?
ect. etc. etc.

im speechless! man! all i do is nod my head and agree with what they are saying! hehe.

i still have to pick a song portraying misogyny and write a paper about it. like! how would i know?!?!?! i don't listen to those type of music! heck!

--originally posted last Aug 25, '06 11:26 PM--

I wish I'm not writing this
I wish I could totally smile
I wish I'm not wondering where you are and see who you're with
I wish your knocking at my door waiting for me to get dressed
I wish your the one I'm talking to on the phone
I wish I'm listening to these songs with you
I wish your the one I will be dancing with on my special day
I wish your the one I'm sharing these pictures with
I wish your the one who's bringing me to class
I wish we're together on our way home
I wish I could make you stay up till early morning just to finish your homework
I wish we're both laughing at our jokes
I wish I could be there to brighten up your day
I wish I could hold your hand on your darkest times
I wish you'll lean on me when your down
I wish I could take care of you when you're sick
I wish I'm giving you the half cup of my rice, you know I can't finish it all by myselfI
I wish to be sharing these fries with you and finally taste your favorite frosty
I wish I could cook you your favorite meal
I wish your telling me when I'm being mean again
I wish your teasing me endlessly on how we both look like the perfect 10
I wish your mocking me on how I'm being a drama queen again
I wish we could watch that upcoming Spiderman movie
I wish we could go to mass together
I wish you'll meet all of my friends and I meet yours
I wish we're talking about silly things and important matters
I wish I'm the one your sharing your secrets with
I wish I could confide in you my realizations at the end of the day
I wish we're arguing over our ideas but still end up so sweet
I wish I could literally come to you for help and cry on your shoulders when I'm being a crybaby again
I wish I could sleep on your lap when I can't take anymore movie marathon
I wish your the first thing I see in the morning and the last one I kiss goodnight
I wish you won't think of me as silly for writing this
I wish I'm not missing you but I totally am
I wish I'm not wishing to be with you but I can't hide the fact that I am

--originally posted last Aug 19, '06 12:33 PM--

it has been a while since my dad and i had our little chat.. he has always been so busy ever since we came to america.. very busy with work.. very busy in finalizing our papers.. busy.. busy.. busy.. but we try to update him though with the latest happenings in our lives.. though some times he fails to listen.. but we understand him..

yesterday evening after bringing our uncle to LAX.. my sis and i had a little bonding with our father.. hehe.. we went to shop at target.. toured a bit over the city.. we showed him my sister's school.. it was his first time to see it okey.. and had a few conversations.. how i miss his lectures and pieces of advice about life and how to be successful in it.. i used to hear a lot of that before.. but i admit it.. these past few months i've been missing that part a lot.. hehehe..

when we got home he just rested for a while and had funny conversations with us.. there was a wild exchange of laughters.. oh how i miss those kinds of happenings.. i miss my dad.. how i wish and pray that this would happen more often..

it made me realize some things.. that our dad really cares for us.. and like every parent, he wants and tries to be present in every event of our lives.. he hates to see us suffer and be very uncomfortable.. and he's working so hard for us.. for our future.. i am more than 100% sure we are in our father's number one priority list.. and that he loves us so much.. that is why he is doing all of this.. for us..

i wish someday i could gather enough courage to show and to tell him how much i love him too..

--originally posted last Aug 15, '06 1:21 PM--

COMING TO AMERICA

What am I to deserve this entry?
To a world of luxury;
Am I not before was sunken;
In poverty and misery.
So to all these things that I have got,
Are there still reasons to be sad?
Must the little fuss that trials bring
Cause us to forget our blessing?


I remember writing this poem when I first came to America. There are so many luxuries that we take for granted. Compares to the Philippines, we are enjoying better lives evident in our way of living. Cars, homes, food, technology, clean air, human rights, justcie, abundant supply of water, electricity, are just a ew to mention. Yet. depression is a major problem in America. I tried to decipher why people are still sad when they got a lot of blessings. It is because the more they get, the more they want. "WANTING MORE THAN WE CAN HAVE LEADS TO DEPRESSION." Let us stop focusing on what we don't have but rather be thankful for everything we got.

by Dr.Espie C. Claudio

P.S.
I got this entry from a newspaper.. and i just thought it's a good thing to help share this lesson to the world..

--originally posted last Aug 13, '06 9:57 PM--

I never thought I'd come to believe in love at first sight
it all started over a little joke
that put a smile on my face and it never left me since then
every moment spent with you was worth years of happiness I didn't think I'd feel

In your eyes I saw a love that's true
a love that I feared to accept because I was scared of hurt
but cupid's magic did its little trick
and soon fate made one our two opposite hearts

I never thought that I'd find the missing piece of my life in you
I never thought the day would still come
that I'd open my heart once more
I never thought that I'd be this happy
I never thought I'd finally say the words "I love you"

Baby, to be with you is where I wanna be for the rest of my life..

--originally posted last Aug 11, '06 7:52 PM--

by Freestyle

Know I havent slept a week at all
Since you've been gone
And my eyes are kinda tired
From crying all night long
Know i've never been too good at cooking just for one
It's so lonely here without you baby
Come back home

'cause i'm half crazy
Feelin' sorry for myself
Half crazy
Worried you'd find someone else to love

Know life hasnt been much fun at all
Since you've been gone
And my eyes being to feel
Each time I hear a sound
I spent every minute asking myself
What went wrong
Can't we try to talk it over baby
Come back home

'cause i'm half crazy
Feelin' sorry for myself
Half crazy
Worried you'd find someone else to love

But baby there is no-one else
Half crazy
For everything you saying
Half crazy
No one else could love you like I do

(break)

'cause i'm half crazy
Feelin' sorry for myself
Half crazy
Worried you'd find someone else to love
But baby there is no-one else
Half crazy
For everything you saying
Half crazy
No one else could ever love you
No one else could ever be

Half crazy
Feeling sorry for myself
And i'm worried you'll find someone else
Feeling sorry for myself Half crazy (faded)


*this is what i feel right now.. i can't deny it but there are times when i end up worrying that you might find someone else to love.. and i find myself wishing that this wont come to an end.. let's stick to our promise baby..*

--originally posted last Aug 8, '06 9:31 AM--

when shopping (for clothes, shoes, bags, etc.) always look for three things..

1. style - does it look good? is it too daring? or too boring? does it fit you? is it too small? or too big?

2. price - is the price just right? could you get the same style for a lower price in another store?

3. quality - is it of poor or high quality? yeah it's cheap but will it last?